Ask Ramis

Dear Ramis,

Is it possible for the infusion of variable catalysts to sequence a nominal reaction while simultaneously producing coagulant dilution equivalent to the hyper acidic exhumation associated with the more typical correlation of optimum regression with minimal stimuli?

Signed,

Wondering in Wauwatosa

Dear WW,

Yeah...probably.

Hair Today Gone Tomorrow

Yesterday, I was walking through a shopping mall and I saw a barber shop...in the mall. Note: this was not a "Hair Salon", it was a barber shop. That alone was unusual. What was even more unusual was that it was absolutely packed with people and there was a line out in the mall. Every chair was full. Some guys had really thick, long hair, others were getting some kind of Mohawk type cut.

At first, I thought there was some kind of promotion for kids going on - like meet Elmo, or Harry Potter, or the Easter Bunny. But it wasn't. All these people were waiting for haircuts.

Here's my other observation about all this:

Most of the young men in their twenties out here have a very similar hairstyle - especially waiters. As near as I can tell, they must accomplish it through an elaborate method that goes something like this -

1) Find a child (preferably a blind one)

2) Have this child randomly cut out chunks of hair from anywhere on your head

3) Sleep on it for 2 or 3 days

4) You're ready to go

Take a (Spring) Break

Here are 3 of my favorite people deeply engrossed in their respective evening pastimes.

My niece Molly is vigilantly crocheting.

Cam Bates is handling a musical instrument (a guitar, for the moment)

Nate Bestor is vigorously attacking a bowl of ice cream.

Everybody's happy.

We had a great time visiting with the Bestor/Bates duo as they stopped in Phoenix en route to the Grand Canyon during their Spring break road trip.

We all sat around listening to Molly and Cam make music, then we went out to eat a great meal.

Next morning, I had a chance to eat breakfast with these guys as they journeyed on.

Cam was a good sport and even rode my motorcycle (even though it's a Harley)

It was great to see them.

You Can't Take It With You

There's the old joke about people talking at the funeral of a rich acquaintance. Someone asks, "How much did he leave?" Someone replies, "He left it all."

In 1974 a group of Chinese peasants were digging a well in the Shaanxi Province. They uncovered some pottery. Archaeologists began working, eventually unearthing an entire army of life-sized clay soldiers, horses and chariots. To date about 8,000 pieces. The soldiers are in ranks with a variety of battle dress and weapons. The army is about 20' below the surface.

The first Emperor of China, Emperor Qin, was buried in the mausoleum which took 32 years to build, surrounded by his army.

Why?

Paul aptly points out in I Corinthians 15:26," The last enemy to be destroyed is death".

Death really is the enemy...but even an army of real men can't defeat it or protect against it.

Certainly not a terracotta army.

You Dirty Rat

This morning I rushed to the gas station to gas up my pickup truck. As son as I started pumping the gas, I notice that it is pouring out under my truck at the same rate I'm pumping it out of the hose.

This is not good.

I shut off the pump and drive back to my place.

As I crawl under the truck to take a look, I notice that there is a hole about the size of a golf ball in the rubber hose to the gas tank.

I can't reach the hose to replace it, since it's behind the frame.

There's hardly any gas in the tank, so I know my range is limited to get someplace to fix it.

I manage to make it to my mechanics in Shopiere. Even though they are very busy, they take the time to replace the hose.

Larry and Chet (my mechanics) tell me that a rodent must have chewed through the hose. Apparently, they like to chew anything rubber... I mean the rodents, not Larry and Chet.